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Sunday, April 30, 2017

Update/Halloween Story

Writing has been a source of comfort for me for many years, and I want to continue nourishing this passion of mine more consistently now. I have been really busy because of school, but I hope to continue sharing my poems, photographs, short stories, and thoughts with you all from now on. I am honored by everyone's support, and I want to make my blog more original and appearance in design and its overall appearance. This is a project that will hopefully be completed by July and give the blog a hopefully beautiful look designed by me :). To begin the renewal of this blog, I wanted to share a Halloween story I wrote last year in 9th grade for my high school's Halloween frightwrite story contest. I won first place. Enjoy, and look out for more of my writings in the next few weeks :) Thank you, and let me know what you guys think in the comments below! Feedback is always welcome :')


Revenge
The water canals along the cozy cobblestone streets shone crystal clear. A dark forest green Christmas tree with ornaments lined with gold, sparkly borders towered the city. And the sun was just beginning to set, the sky sprinkled in shades of rose, violet, and touches of orange. Teenage girls raced with their bicycles stocked with flowers down the streets, screaming playful insults at one another. It was a jolly holiday day in Amsterdam.
An artist by the name of Antonio painted by the street corner. His gaze on the canvas was focused. Antonio was a handsome, twenty-something year old man of a lean frame, and long, thin fingers. Identified by his artist beret and dimple smile, the young man was very tender and shy. He entered the Amsterdam artist neighborhood only recently from Colombia, and his Dutch was very weak. Antonio excelled in portrait painting, and he often took portraits of random locals who strolled the streets of Amsterdam in the evening. People always marveled at his fine portraits. However, one foggy, dull evening, after he picked up some groceries and walked towards his apartment, Antonio saw a tall, pale woman with a tan-colored coat saunter down the road. She was scowling, and her features were very sharp. An urge of desire overwhelmed Antonio. He wanted to paint her face, with the right textures, the right colors, that very moment. He inhaled the chilly air sharply.
He ran to her, and tapped her shoulder. Antonio was breathing heavily; he was excited. “Hey, my name is Antonio. I am an artist, I paint portraits. I want to paint your portrait and capture your expression. I will give it to you for free. Just give me thirty minutes.” The woman gave him a nasty glare and gritted her teeth. She was smoking a cigarette. She was a racist woman, and she loathed cultural diversity in Amsterdam. She was one of the few who believed that Amsterdam was meant for only the Dutch. Therefore, Antonio’s broken Dutch and exotic appearance caused her to disrespect him.
“Fine.” She rolled her eyes, and bit her maroon-tinted lips. The woman secretly wanted to see how the portrait would come out, as she was somewhat self-obsessed.
So the next half hour was spent by the thoughtful man and the rude woman. While Antonio polished the woman’s features and gaze on the canvas, the woman smoked her cigarette. As time flew by, her face grew paler and paler, and her eyes drooped down. Antonio was so engrossed in his painting that he did not care to observe the woman while he was finetuning her shoulders, eyebrows, and pale skin tone on the canvas. After two hours of endless finetuning, he smiled proudly to himself. “All done,” he whispered, self-satisfied.  Antonio looked up. He saw the body of the woman, leaning against the chair. Her arms looked feeble. The crescent moon glistened against the midnight sky, and Antonio lightly shook the woman. He thought that she had fallen asleep. “Come on now,” he whispered. “I am done. Look at this work of art.”
Antonio then checked the woman’s heart rate. There was no beat, and all what was left of her was her frowning face on the canvas, with plumes of smoke engulfing her beauty.
He was never an honest man in life thus far. Antonio quietly left the scene of his painting and shamefully trudged up the steep road to his flat. There was no point in taking the stranger to the hospital, as she was already dead for a good two hours. “After all, it is her fault for smoking,” Antonio thought to himself as he guiltily looked down at his painting. He stared at the dull aqua eyes and the long, wavy black hair on the canvas, and he placed the canvas in his closet, under a heap of miscellaneous things. Tears streamed down his face and his eyes were bloodshot red. He blamed the woman’s death on his obsession with painting. That winter night, for the first time in a long time, Antonio cried himself to sleep.
          The day started off wrong. The next early morning was gloomy, and Antonio was in a sullen mood. When his friends talked about casual matters, he replied cruelly. People were wondering what was wrong with him, why his dimple-smile vanished from his face in just one day. Antonio painted impassionately. His attractive hazel eyes transformed into a dull blue color, and a voice constantly hissed in his head that day. A woman’s voice. It was raspy and slurred, and Antonio carefully listened to that voice. The voice carried into the late hours of the night, when Antonio was trying to fall asleep. “Paint a portrait of yourself, a self-portrait,” the voice snickered. The voice controlled Antonio; his instinct told him to obey that voice. So he did. He got up from bed. He prepared his paints and canvas, and outlined his face with a pencil, using a mirror as a reference. “Now add some red paint to the canvas. Add a cigarette. Add smoke,” The voice laughed eerily. Antonio obeyed. He finished the portrait. He stared at it feverishly; he was clueless. “Now get a knife and slice your neck.” Antonio’s body stiffened and his hand trembled, but after a while of hesitation, he had no choice but to slice his neck. It was as if he was possessed by the voice. Blood gushed onto the canvas. And as he died painfully with his self-portrait in his arms, the cigarette-smoking woman entered as a ghost into his apartment. She laughed mockingly. Her name was Revenge.


Saturday, July 2, 2016

How to Use Sources of Motivation to Create a Fullfilling Life

You never actually know about how much you are capable of doing. With work ethic and the vibrant iota of fervor, the simplest person can rapidly progress and accomplish many of his/her aspirations. The key to potential success is based on only three things: individuality, confidence, and emotional intelligence. Individuality is the inner drive to stand apart from the crowd, and pride in your work gives you courage to do so. Emotional intelligence includes ignoring conflicts that are detrimental in your life plans. And to those stressed about not having a passion, you know, that one thing that you think your friend devotes her entire life to, do not worry. The de facto goal in a fulfilling life is to do things. Many things. All sorts of things. Passion is the accumulation of all of these activities, and it will arrive with time.

I must admit, it is difficult to stay motivated all the time. If people were constantly inspired, everyone around you would be living happy, diligent lives, not instantly, but perhaps in a few years. My personal sources of encouragement and desire include my mom, YouTube, and BlogLovin, a platform where people's blog posts are professionally streamed. Why YouTube? Isn't YouTube merely a time-waster to today's media-addictive youth? Not to me. YouTube contains videos with genuine, real people actually talking. People who air their videos on YouTube might as well be a live person, except the person is communicating his/her thoughts via a screen. I have been wanting to have a vegan, non-dairy, lifestyle for quite some time now; however, I was worried I would not be able to commit to this strict diet. YouTube inspired me because people just like me tried this diet for the very first time and sincerely talked about its benefits. YouTube gave me that push that I needed to become vegan; I did not let the dissatisfaction of my parents with my dietary lifestyle affect my decision of fully becoming a proud vegan.

BlogLovin taught me how to present myself, with a sense of style and personality, confidence, and a professional side to my writing. Furthermore, it encouraged me to deeply think about my future careers, and know that I should do something I love to do when I get a career. ^_^ I follow mostly fashion and photography blogs on BlogLovin, and the bloggers seem very ardent with what they do.

My mom encourages me to be adventurous and let go of my fears. She literally tells me that I am strong enough to do anything. I remember that when I was in fifth or sixth grade, we went to Lake Tahoe with another family. I had never skied before, and it felt frightening to me. The high, steep slopes of snow taunted me, and I was anxious of the thought of going up there on a zipline cart. My mom was adamant on me skiing. After endless excuses, I finally listened to her because I simply had to. She was starting to become stubborn and angry in front of the public, in the food court room at the Boreal skiing place. I was with a group of 8-12 year olds in my first skiing class, and I loved it! I learned how to ski step-by-step and I felt a wave of satisfaction when I reached the bottom of the fluffy, snowy hill which was now my friend. After this initial skiing trip to Boreal, my family went there again after a few months. I skied again, with just me and the teacher in a private class. He skied downhill very quickly, and I learned so many techniques from him. Skiing is now one of my favorite sports thanks to my mom!! I love it, except for the heavy overalls we have to wear :(

So, passion, in my opinion is about working hard and surrounding yourself with sincere, honest people who have willpower. But do not worry about not having a passion. Go with the flow of a heartfelt life. And miracles will happen. :))




Thursday, November 26, 2015

Top Ten: What I am Thankful For

I made a top ten what I'm thankful for list two years ago in December, and I decided to do it once again. When is a better time to feel gratitude.. Thanksgiving Day? ;) Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

1. AHS Marching Band
I am thankful for my high school's marching band because there are really sweet, diligent and hardworking people in this band. It never stops amazing me how hardworking these people are, in everything they do (marching, attending rehearsals all the time, maintaining their grades.) Also, this band is kinda like my second family. I mean, it is not like everyone in the marching band is my bestie, but we stick together all the time, through the bad and good times.

2. DSLR Camera
I love taking photos and capturing memories.... and the DSLR camera makes every scene pretty, so whenever I look at the beautiful photos it captures, I smile.

3. Heartfelt Notes/Letters (whether it be thank you notes, happy birthday cards, school yearbook signatures, etc.)
I love receiving and reading long letters because I never get tired of reading the same genuine one over and over again. Also, I feel relevant and special...

4. Fuzzy Socks
Fuzzy socks are cozy and I love the feeling of extra warm feet.

5. Documentaries
Some documentaries are actually pretty fast-paced, and after I finish watching a documentary, I feel accomplished, for some odd reason.

6. My Kathak Dance Teacher, Pragya Aunty....
I like Kathak dance for its fun spins/fast feet and elegance, and I feel happy that I have learned it, and I would not have learned this dance without the guidance of my teacher :)

7. My Mom
My mom gives me so much love, and so many things! She gives me food on the table, warm hugs, and she is always there when I need her. She never hesitates with helping me with anything, and she always puts me before herself.

8. My Close Friends
My friends are so understanding. They listen to my ramblings, even the weird ones; they understand that I need to get my words out, and most of them know me so well. Their jokes and comments make me crack up, and my life is 100 times brighter with them around.

9. Getting Lost in a Good Book w/ Hot Chocolate -(that is so good that reading 3 hours of it feels like 15 minutes of reading)

10. Role Models
Instead of getting frustrated by the people that are smarter than me, more detail-oriented than me, more determined than me, more athletic than me, etc. , I admire them. I use them as a source of motivation to work harder and try my absolute 110%, so that I can be regret-free, happier, and prouder of myself. :))

15 November 2015: My Enjoyable Experience at Stanford University

I wish I brought my camera because the Stanford campus was so beautiful! Tall, shady trees with golden and purple colored leaves adorned the field. The weather was lovely as the sun was out, but the air was breezy... It was actually raining heavily, early morning. I visited the Stanford campus today, Sunday, November 15, 2015 for an engineering class field trip. It was an engineering event for only girls. The purpose of this field trip was to promote engineering for girls in what would otherwise be a male-dominated career choice, and I must say I learned quite a lot from the experience. We received information about college and STEM jobs from successful Stanford grad and undergraduate students. Most of them were dressed very professional and businesslike, and one woman even started several start-ups in the Silicon Valley. To be honest, before attending this field trip, like many other common people, I thought that engineering was boring. However, after talking with educated female engineers, my outlook on engineering changed completely. I am still not completely sure if I want to pursue the engineering career pathway, but I found engineering to be interesting. I mean, there are so many diverse fields to explore: biomedical, mechanical, civil, computer science, etc. These fields impact the world positively. Approximately a decade ago, Columbia Business School performed a research study, in which they requested students to assess the feats listed on the resume of a fake "Howard Roizen (male)." At the end, the students called Heidi Roizen "more selfish and less desirable" than Howard. Nevertheless, Heidi and "Howard's" resume were exactly the same. Sexism is a major conflict in the Silicon Valley itself. Also, studies have shown that women in engineering make a third less than men. Women engineers are very courageous and diligent; they have overcome many biased stereotypes saying what women should and should not be. Also, they have probably been one of the only women in their engineering college classes. For that, I applaud these women for bringing a new face to the future of engineering, and for doing their own thing, despite outside barriers or stereotypes. The women engineers that talked to our group of high school freshman told us that they were remembered as the only female in the class, and they obviously deserve to be remembered, because of their open, highly enriched minds.

Tuesday, August 11, 2015

"It is an honor to share this moment with you"

"It is an honor to share this moment with you." These are the words I heard fall out of a man supposedly in his late twenties... he quite calmly said this quote to another man also around the same age, while the two were thoughtfully enjoying the astounding view from the top floor of the legendary Eiffel Tower in Paris, France. I obviously had to evoke meaning from this beautiful phrase that I honestly simply heard, not eavesdropped! The quote touched my heart; it touched different corners of it that haven't been touched before for a long time. I wish I could say that quote to someone with 100 percent meaning because the quote is so powerful. Why so powerful? Because the view from the Eiffel Tower and the Eiffel Tower itself left me awestruck. It bothers me to see self-centered qualities in copious amounts of people I meet; however, the quote taught me a lesson, a moral that a quote sparkled with generosity leaves back a longer, stronger memory than a quote cursed with evil anger and selfishness. For instance, if the man was talking trash to his companion, i would have easily forgotten the bad words/trash. Nevertheless, I still remember the quote "It is an honor to share this moment with you." I also learned that happiness not only comes from oneself; it also comes from the people you share a loving, personal relationship with. One must be selfless enough to appreciate that the presence of a particular person/people makes them feel as if they are on cloud nine.








Monday, August 3, 2015

Powerful Words

Currently, I am in overpopulated, exotic India with my extended family, and well, one of the main vehicles used here for public transportation is an autorickshaw. One has to pay money to the driver to get to a particular location. My mother, grandma, sister, and I went to a mall by autorickshaw, and as awkward as this may sound, I actually learned the genuine colors of generosity, kindness, and beautiful human nature from my mom in that short safari to the mall. Usually, from my personal experience, India's general population do not treat autorickshaw drivers with equal respect and attitude as they treat hmm maybe someone who holds a high job position or someone who is attractive. This is because of solitary arrogance (autorikshaw drivers are relatively poor.) Nevertheless, as soon as my sister, mom, and I sat in the autorickshaw, waiting for my granny, my mother simply asked the driver about his day. She politely questioned him if whether we were his first ride, as it was late morning, and he carefully replied no; he stated that he started taking rides from early morning itself because riding an autorickshaw is the only way that he can survive and eat a decent amount of food to remain nourished. My mom then slightly smiled, murmuring that he was very conscientious. During the 10-15 minutes ride to the mall, my mom and grandmom were engaged in a conversation, and surprisingly, the autorickshaw driver pitched into the conversation with ease, saying one or two statements in relation to the conversation (saying that the mall is extremely crowded on Saturdays and Sundays, etc.) Additionally, my grandmom was discussing with my mom on how I loved autorickshaws so much when I was an infant since I loved the feeling of the breezy wind on my cheeks while the ride was in motion. She also talked about how I moved around in the autorickshaw with childhood joy, happiness from the heart in the smallest things. Afterwards, the autorickshaw driver unintentionally let out a light-hearted laugh. During the course of approximately a quarter of an hour, I assimilated so many beautiful qualities from both the driver and my mom. From my mom, I learned that starting a conversation with someone, even a stranger, can give you an opportunity to catch sincere traits. For instance, my mom learned that one should be hardworking to truly achieve their goals in life. And I absorbed hard work from the man, the driver, the whoever, the stranger!.... Now, while typing this, after approximately a few hours of riding the vehicle, I am more diligent in anything I do-important or not so significant... even if just a little bit :) 
"The limits of my language means the limits of my world."
-Ludwig Wittgenstein


Wednesday, July 15, 2015

My Amazing, Inner Emotional Experience at the Anne Frank House Museum / Mr. Dussel

I can genuinely connect to one of Anne Frank's most popular quote: "In spite of everything, I still believe that people are really good at heart." Whenever I read this quote, my heart thumps. I feel as if Anne is within me because her quote is my personal life lesson. I strongly believe that there is beauty and good in everyone's hearts, that an individual naturally has both bad and good qualities, and one must embrace the good qualities even if they are deep deep down and hidden. My religion teacher has also reinforced this moral in me. She teaches the entire batch of students about the Mahabharata, a religious piece of literature that has a vital moral. The moral that there is a fight between good and evil within oneself, but that good always wins. It is so so amazing how Anne had such beautiful thoughts and ideals regarding human nature at such a young, tender age, even when she lived during a horrifying time in history. She is my role model.. I love her so so much :) I visited the Anne Frank House in Amsterdam to learn more about the Holocaust because of my interest and curiosity about it, but instead I learned not only more about the Holocaust but also treasured lessons of humanity from a powerful young girl..... It is absolutely outrageous and unfair how so many souls lost their lives with injustice during the Holocaust..I hope that the world keeps this in memory forever, for all the children, men and women, and sincere helpers who died.....Anne's voice is so remarkable that it itself speaks for the millions of Jews that died during World War II.... God bless her :-)    
Fritz Pfeffer and his son Werner Peter Pfeffer

I especially enjoyed the Fritz Pfeffer (Mr. Dussel in Anne's diary because Dussel means idiot/goof in German-she didn't really like him) exhibition that recently opened in the museum (April) because it included a lot of unknown facts and opinions about Mr. Fritz that are essential for people to know. Essential because how he is portrayed in Anne's diary is completely different than how he is described by his family. For instance, check out the video on the righthand side on how Mr. Fritz's son emotionally recalls memories of his father with Miep Gies, the 20-something-year-old helper who gave the people hiding in the Secret Annex (the Frank family, the Van Daan family, and Mr. Fritz Pfeffer) food and other items needed for survival. There was a video (that I unfortunately can't find on YouTube) playing in the exhibition room in the museum in which Werner Peter Pfeffer, Mr. Pfeffer's son, mentioned his dad as a deeply religious and kind, loving man who was willing to help anyone. Mr. Fritz Pfeffer married Vera Bythiner in 1921, and the couple had Werner Peter in 1927. They both divorced in 1933 and Fritz received custody of his child. Fritz then met and fell in love with a woman named Charlotte Kaletta, but the Nurnberger Laws of 1935 stated that marriage was forbidden between Jews and non-Jews, so the two were unable to marry as Kaletta was not Jewish. The couple then moved to Amsterdam; however, in Amsterdam too they were denied the right to marry. In 1938, due to increasing Nazi activity in Amsterdam, Fritz sent his only son Werner Peter from Amsterdam to England by boat to live with the young boy's uncle Ernst. Additionally, Dussel went into hiding in the Secret Annex in 1942 without Charlotte, as she was not Jewish/safe.  In her book ‘Anne Frank Remembered’ Miep Gies describes how she carried letters between Fritz Pfeffer and Charlotte Kaletta:
Fritz Pfeffer and his love Charlotte Kaletta




‘Once a week I would meet Charlotte Kaletta, a charming blonde woman one year older than I. She would give me letters, books, parcels and bits of dental equipment that Fritz Pfeffer had requested. She was not Jewish, and because she no longer had a Jew with her she was in no danger. I told Charlotte that I had to turn over the things she gave me to someone else, who was the one who delivered them to Fritz. I pretended to know nothing about where her fiancĂ© was hiding. However, Charlotte was a discreet and sensitive person; she knew better than to search out information. She never asked anything of me. We exchanged letters and parcels until the next week when we would repeat the process.’
( www.annefrankguide.net )  

It is interesting how the way a person looks at you impacts on how you are presented to people. In Anne Frank's diary, Mr. Ffritz Pfeffer is described as a foolish, selfish man (because Anne may have had a few bad experiences with him by chance), when in reality he was probably not, as the Anne Frank House beautifully unlocks Mr. Pfeffer's hidden personality in its exhibit on Mr. Pfeffer. For years, Mr. Pfeffer was portrayed as a not-so-nice man to strangers who read Anne's diary, but I hope that their thoughts change after they know and appreciate his inner beauty :)

Anne Frank

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